Issue 1
So What is HWP? Jack's Ramblings:  Jesus WAS a Jew        Steward Illustration
TDS BlueRoot
Stacia Horvath Burton
Tonya McAdams
 

 


 

O.K.!  Let's face it.   The Passion is one hell of a movie.

But...... I have some questions about it. Jesus was a Jew, Right? So it's
agreed, the people involved are all Jewish. Right? He was 'offed' by the
Romans. No? The people who conspired with the Romans to 'off' him were Jews. Right?

The "anti-Jesus" Jews were Jews, just like the Jews who followed Jesus,
except they didn't like Jesus. This logically makes sense. Right? So
actually, the "Passion of the Christ" is Jew against Jew.

And there's more, Jesus was the first 'hippie', too. He had long hair, a
beard, talked love, peace and burned incense! Beads, too........like
Rosary Beads, made from extinct mammoth tusks or Unicorn horns! Would Jesus love the Jefferson Airplane?, Moby Grape?, Janis Joplin?, Jimi Hendryx?....of course, Jesus loved everyone. Jesus would even have loved the Grateful Dead. They just might be the "house band" on Judgment Day (pardon the joke), Jesus was way cool - he brought people back from the dead like those EMT guys do on TV. Jesus also came back from the dead, just like Buffy, except she was only on TV, he really DID it! And reported back! Then there's this 'walking on water' thing. Doh! Who's done that 'right' since then........Madonna? Sure! We all know she used TV effects - uh? Did Jesus have a 'steady cam'? No way! No one was there to broadcast that Columbus had discovered a new world. It was the first guy off the ship that told that story - he was the reporter and he told the people - was that reporter wrong? Not telling the truth? Well Jesus had 4 reporters, all were Jews - even Mary and Joseph were Jews! 

Could we then say the four reporters (Apostles) wrote for the 'Calvary
Gospel Reporter'? Way cool? Huh?

The crimes and evil against man by man far exceed the number of ants in
an ant hill. Jesus, the Jew, wanted everyone to love everyone else! He
wanted to defeat evil and injustices through love. Better cool? Huh? Hugh Hefner had the same kinda idea, except he was more focused on the smarmy side of love, in a sense, carnal, that had no effect on evil (remember all those one-night stands?) Jesus always wore robes and there were no depictions of Jesus naked, except those baby picture renditions. Is it a coincidence? Hugh Hefner also wears robes! Bathrobes! 

And you never see a picture of him naked either. Right? Jesus hung out with Mary Magdalen, Hugh Hefner has Mandy, Brandy, Candy, etc. Mary was scorned for her profession, yet Jesus loved her. Hugh Hefner loves his ladies, too, until he abruptly dumps them and then he no longer gives them any of 'his love', except if there's child support. Jesus never did that, perhaps, he was more careful?. I don't know if Hugh Hefner is Jewish, but his idea of 'love everyone' is 180 degrees opposite of Jesus'. It is here where the similarity ends. Hefner wouldn't like Jesus, but Jesus would love him.   There's no implication Jesus was a homosexual here, because Jesus emphatically said he loved every living soul.

Jesus always spoke of the Kingdom of God. Right? Men, since before the appearance of Jesus and even today, have tried to put their own kingdoms together. They have always failed because they died! Yes, they died. God never died, God outlasts all of them. Let's take Bill Gates who is now the master of the Kingdom of Microsoft. Jesus would love him.  He wouldn't love Jesus. Jesus would want Bill Gates to share his beneficence with 'the meek and the poor'. Two examples of Jesus at his best were the 'loaves and the fishes' and the 'wedding wine'. Where Bill Gates would've opened up a concession stand to sell the extra bread and fish and 'kept the bar closed' until the tab was paid, Jesus kept the meal going at a Woodstock type of event and, for the lucky groom, kept the wine flowing at the marriage! Whew! That's a lot of work for 'donations'! Could you see Bill Gates do that? Sure? After Jesus was tortured he was crucified and put to death to return to the 'Kingdom of his Father'. On the other hand Bill Gates tortures every living soul that 'enters' the Kingdom of Microsoft'. Instead of crowns of thorns, whips, nails, the wily Bill Gates uses evil codes and formulas to create Win XP, MS Word, Internet Explorer in order to copy your personal information, similar to God but a lot more evil, and give this information to others who now have your weaknesses so they may offer you temptations. Boy, doesn't this sound familiar? Huh? Think the Devil in the Garden of Eden! Right! If Bill Gates disapproves of your actions, his vengeance is often fatal with the 'black screen' of death or the 'blue screen' of re-set. Jesus never faced wrath like the Kingdom of Microsoft before, but he could easily handle the threat if posed. Jesus would only have to ask his Father for a 'grain of sand' from the Universe, he created, and aim it at Seattle. But, Jesus, the Jew, loves Bill Gates, too, so don't count on it. Is Bill Gates Jewish?

And so my reading public 'Passion of the Christ' is probably a great
movie with many things to learn about Jesus. One thing I got to admit
Jesus took one hell of a beating, like Floyd Paterson against Sonny
Liston. Both Jesus and Floyd bled like a garroted lamb. And Jesus had
more power than the 'Energizer Bunny' and the Timex watch combined, but those were only on TV. The batteries in my Walkman have died - never to come back to life either - and my Timex often makes the universe go a little fast, sometimes slow, but when it stopped it was still right 2 times a day. Jesus never cared about Walkmen or time, he dealt with forever. Forever is a hard word to even imagine - the 'Energizer Bunny' and a Timex won't last forever, but who cares. When they invent something like an MP3 player, I don't need my walkman, so who cares if it doesn't last forever. My Timex may ............. take a beating and keep on ticking........but not as bad as Jesus' beating, if that beating and torture killed Jesus....what chance does my Timex have! Right?

Well, I never did get around to seeing the movie, but anything about
Jesus must be cool and I hope he plays some of the roles I've placed him in. I'll bet Mel Gibson didn't even scratch the surface, perhaps he can get some story plots from this when and if he does - Jesus - The Sequel or Jesus vs Alla and the 40 Islamic Terrorists or Jesus vs Buddha/Peace and Love vs Love and Peace, think of the possibilities. Jesus was a hell of a guy!!!!
 

Jack Abbott,  was the power behind the 2003 Max's Kansas City charity art auction held in NYC.  It showcased the work of many famous and very talented artists including his wife Mary Abbott's work in florals.    Max's Kansas City was the in place back in the 70's where the rockstars and famous actors were the regulars.   Jack, of course, was a regular too.   Jack can often be seen hobnobbing with friends who are celebrities and rock stars from the ole' days but Jack isn't one to waste time socializing without making things happen . . . he's always looking for great talent to feature in his next big benefit concert or to represent as agent.   Jack has worn many hats in his long-time career in entertainment and communications.   He was a feature writer for the Village Voice in Greenwich Village for many years, a true professional who's launched many a successful PR campaign and the owner of his own record company which represented many of the Punk Rock all time favorites.   He is now in the process of putting together a DVD which will feature his exclusive footage of interviews with and live recordings of the 70's to 80's eras' greatest names in music.

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